Writing for the Struggle Bus

A few years ago, back when I was giving stand-up comedy my first spin, there was a website called The Struggle Bus.com, run by fellow comedians Eric Prae and Jenn Belso. The website was a chronicle of adventures and funny situations and was even featured in the local newspaper. Unfortunately, it has since been shut down and sucked up by another business venture. Because I like publishing my work, I am posting the one article I did for them here so it can be read and cherished by future generations.

Greetings. I am Jordi Scrubbings. Like Eric, Jenn, and the dog, I am a writer/comic in Tampa. I also like to call myself a “creative genius”, but to be honest that’s a bit of lie – I failed the child genius test by one point. But if it worked for Wile E. Coyote, I’m making it work for me.

Anyway, you may know me from other ventures such as my website, www.theserioustip.com, my appearances on Deadspin.com and other sports sites, or my tweet venture, TheManInc, a log of everything The Man is doing to hold people down. I’m all over the place, and now I am here.

I have weird ideas. Like I once thought that the movie Men in Black was made to desensitize the general population to the evils of the real-life Men in Black, you know, those government agents who made people disappear. I also used to think Joe DiMaggio killed John F. Kennedy because JFK slept with Marilyn Monroe. Then I also thought that my GI Joes and Transformers came alive when I went to sleep and protected me from evil spirits and nightmares. But I don’t think those things anymore.

I’m grown up now. Or so they tell me.

These days I find myself hanging out various places around Tampa. Of course, I’m at the Improv, I’m at sporting events – I’ve been a Rays season ticket holder the last few years, I go to a lot of concerts, and when I am not doing any of those things, I’m checking out the modern spectacle that is professional wrestling.  Little known fact: I made a cameo on this site a few months ago. Yup, that was me in the big afro wig in Jenn’s wrestling write-up. But Jenn loves me now and I love her too. She was just disappointed that a guy with that big of an afro could have a little penis. What can I say? I came up short, just like in the child genius test.

But I will be writing here once a week or so. Maybe I’ll write about sports and sunshine, maybe it will be about beer or barbeque, or maybe I’ll be penning a sonnet to my dear Reese Witherspoon.

By the way, should I find it weird that she has a kid born on my birthday? I think getting into a relationship with a girl with a kid would be challenging enough, but having to share my birthday with that kid would make it even tougher. My birthday should be my day, the day she spoils me. But if it’s her kid’s birthday too, then we have to do the party thing with the balloons, the cake, and the pin the tail on the donkey. And then not only will the kid get all the presents, but at the end of the night, after everything is cleaned up and all the rugrats have gone home, Reese would probably be too tired to give me some birthday lovin’.

And that’s a total dealbreaker.

Charlie Brown: The Last Lovable Loser

The economy is in the crapper.

People fight and kill over religion.

Gas prices are high.

You still can't pee on the Alamo.

But at least you're not Charlie Brown.



You know, sometimes I think the fact that Charlie Brown was such a lovable loser was good for society back in the day. There aren't any new lovable losers anymore. There are characters that keep failing and make a show of it or ones that act out to fight their oppressors - they would have fought Lucy or punched her in the nose. But they don't have the grace of Charlie Brown. Charlie Brown isn't a bad guy, he is just a guy who didn't win.

And no one gave him a trophy just for showing up, either. He went home empty handed.

Then he tried again.

My latest for the Tampa Bay Times and other music links

Getting back into the groove in regards to writing regularly again. As I write more, I meet more interesting people who have great stories I can write about. It's a great cycle to be in.

My latest article is on a veteran of the Tampa hip-hop scene, an MC named Paradox. Formerly known as Spike La Rock, Paradox is attempting to unify Tampa's hip-hop under the Zulu Nation banner. He has been around hip-hop since the early days in New York City and it was great spending time with him and hearing his story and his future plans.

Tampa rapper aiming to launch Zulu Nation chapter - Tampa Bay Times, 18 July 2013

Now a few music items I didn't write:

1) Sad news: Bluesman T-Model Ford passed away this week. Although not as well known as bluesmen with more lengthy and distinguished careers, T-Model Ford was a Mississippi Delta blues performer whose sound echoed that of the Robert Johnson, Son House, and other blues legends. I saw T-Model Ford play an acoustic set in Clarksdale, Mississippi in what remains as one of the best music trips I have ever taken. He was a great performer and a great musician.

2) Disturbing news: Varg Vikernes, former leadman of the Norwegian Black Metal band Burzum, was arrested in France this week for "plotting a massacre". One, I didn't know Vikernes was a free man - he was found guilty of murdering a fellow musician, Mayhem guitarist Øystein "Euronymous" Aarseth. According to the almighty Wikipedia, he was released in 2009. Second, who let Vikernes correspond with the guy in Norway who killed 77 people and blamed it on hip hop and video games? According to reports, that correspondence led French authorities to arrest him and his wife when Mrs. Vikernes (he is married?) bought four rifles.

(Update: Vikernes and his wife were released due to lack of evidence. Makes sense, as correspondence with a homicidal extremist, writing racist blogs, and arming yourself does not actually make you a threat. But I am sure the French authorities will continue to monitor him.)

3) On the subject of anti-authority, albeit far less violent, Rebel Frequencies wrote an interesting piece on Woody Guthrie, American protest folk singer. Although best known for singing "This Land Is Our Land", Guthrie was a staunch anti-capitalist. (This was written back in October, but I just found it among my bookmarks. Still worth the read.)

4) In other Tampa Bay-based news, sports injury writer Will Carroll wrote a blog post dissecting the mechanics of singer Carly Rae Jepsen's ill attempt at a first pitch during last week's Tampa Bay Rays game. Very interesting as Carroll breaks down Jepsen's body motion and figures out exactly where she went horribly wrong.

5) Last, but not least, here is a page where you can download Tampa MC and hip-hop writer Slick Worthington's latest album. Support local music. Maybe I should write about him soon.

Thoughts on Writing by a Writer

One of my most favorite blogs is 20-Nothings, a blog by now-LA based writer Jessie Rosen. Jessie and I probably have as little in common as two people could. She is a female under 30 living in Los Angeles who is giving the writing career an honest to goodness try and I am an over-30 guy on the East Coast who moonlights as a writer on occasion. But it is her honesty and rawness that makes me really like her blog.

Did I mention Jessie is also a writer?

As a writer, she often writes about writing, which is not that unusual for writers to do. Back in December, she wrote a great piece on what happens when writers don't feel like writing. She compares it to going to the gym - sure one day off won't kill you, but if you want that six pack abs or that below 10% body fat, you better suck up your laziness and get to the gym.

The creative process is about as easily explained as it is understood, but at its core, it is just another form of work. There are days when you'd rather procrastinate with absolutely anything rather than sit down to write the pages you need to write. I have re-organized my closet in ROYGBIV order; experimented with varying degrees of a smokey eye, thank you pixiwoo.com!; and assigned myself to a personal Quick Fire Challenge: vegetarian chili, contents of your cupboard, 20 minutes, go!

"But you're a writer!" you yell at yourself, "writers write!"

That is true, but that doesn't mean that we don't hate it from time to time. I know that I can write - I've done it countless times before - but that doesn't mean there aren't still days where I wake up gravely fearing the blank white page, days when I am certain I have no idea what I'm doing.

Amen.

Kinda reminds me of the hook from rapper Skyzoo's song "The Rage of Romello":

The rage of Roemello
My name tryna echo
Staring so long I swear the page saying hello
I'm hearing these songs but tryna change up the metro
It feel like he'ron the way I'm straining wit the let go
The rage of it all, I swear to God

Victor Licata, Trayvon Martin, and Marijuana

Few people have a favorite ax murder. Devouring details of people hacked to death is usually the territory of criminologists or psychopaths.

Yet ever since I learned the epic ax murder that changed the face of public opinion on marijuana occurred in Tampa’s Ybor City, I have been enamored with the case of Victor Licata.

To summarize, on the night of October 17, 1933, someone killed five members of the Licata family with an ax. According to police reports, blood was everywhere. From author Paul Guzzo’s article in a 2011 issue of Cigar City Magazine:

“On the bed in the front room they found Michael Licata lying in a welter of blood, killed with one swing of an axe. In the adjoining bedroom they found the bodies of the family’s 22-year-old soon-to-be-married daughter, Prudence, and her 8-year-old brother, Jose, both hacked to death. In the rear bedroom they found the murdered mother, 44-year-old Rosalie. On the bed beside her lay her 14-year-old son, Philip, alive but suffering from numerous axe wounds. And lying on the floor next to the bed was the murder weapon–a blood-stained axe.”

Reports continue by stating the police found 21-year old Victor Licata, the sole Licata family member still alive, cowering in his room with blood stains on his shirt.

Sounds like an open and closed case, right?

Not so fast.

Victor Licata’s supposed use of marijuana (he was labeled the “Marihuana Maniac”) was a key part of the prosecution. The fact that marijuana was associated with the murder made the drug public enemy number one, leading to the “Reefer Madness” phenomenon.

It also led to many pro-marijuana advocates to re-examine the Licata case. A few writers even believe Licata was innocent. That's what makes the case so interesting.

Many of their points, for example, are on the site “The Reefer Madness Museum”.

• There was a serial Axe murderer operating in the Tampa area at the time


• That the Licata family was NOT the only Tampa family cut down by an Axe murderer.


• That one of the other families slain by the serial Axe murderer was the Rowell Family - same last name as the author of "On the Trail of Marihuana, the Weed of Madness”


• That Victor Licata (to his dying day) denied that he has ever used Marihuana and that there was never a scratch of evidence to even suggest that he ever had?


• That at least one of the major players (the Detective chief who had accused Victor Licata of having committed the murders) has been caught (documented) lying about the matter?


• That much of the (alleged) evidence against Victor Licata was fabricated and so fake it wouldn’t have stood the light of day in a courtroom?


• That many of the senior people within the Tampa judicial justice system knew the truth – and choose (for whatever reason), to deliberately keep quiet?

Also adding to the dispute is Victor Licata’s size. According to reports, he was only 5’8 and 120 lbs. Not a big man by any means. Could marijuana have made a skinny young strong enough to move furniture and wield an ax with such brutality?

It is now pretty much popular consensus that marijuana did not play a huge role in the Licata family murders. Medical reports indicate Victor Licata had several other mental problems, and wasn’t exactly fit for society. And back in the day, Tampa wasn't exactly a paradise of proper legal process. So there may just be room for debate.

As it is my "favorite" ax murder, the other day I mentioned the Licata case on twitter to Tampa Bay Times writer Ben Montgomery. Montgomery has been tweeting about the George Zimmerman/Trayvon Martin trial since it started and was discussing Martin’s supposed use of marijuana and what role if any the drug might have played in the incident that led to Martin’s death.

Based on our discussion, Montgomery used the Licata case as a topic for his own article comparing it to the Zimmerman case. Definitely worth the read. Check it out:

At Zimmerman trial, marijuana testimony echoes famous Tampa killings

More thoughts on Natural Rhythm

A little over three years ago, I wrote a blog post on string theory and natural rhythm. I read a few articles and theorized that there is much we don't know about the natural rhythms of life and of our brain and how the whole thing is linked together. I always thought it was one of the smartest things I have ever written.

Over the past few months, I have collected two more articles (both from Wired.com) on the brain and music. In the first, Human Brain is Wired for Harmony, writer Elizabeth Norton discusses recent scientific conclusions that have helped take the first steps in learning why our brain does not like dissonant noises but prefers smoother consonant sounds.

In a musical chord, for example, several notes combine to produce a sound wave containing all of the individual frequencies of each tone. Specifically, the wave contains the base, or “fundamental,” frequency for each note plus multiples of that frequency known as harmonics. Upon reaching the ear, these frequencies are carried by the auditory nerve to the brain. If the chord is harmonic, or “consonant,” the notes are spaced neatly enough so that the individual fibers of the auditory nerve carry specific frequencies to the brain. By perceiving both the parts and the harmonious whole, the brain responds to what scientists call harmonicity.

In a dissonant chord, however, some of the notes and their harmonics are so close together that two notes will stimulate the same set of auditory nerve fibers. This clash gives the sound a rough quality known as beating, in which the almost-equal frequencies interfere to create a warbling sound. Most researchers thought that phenomenon accounted for the unpleasantness of a dissonance.

In another article, writer David Dobbs of Wired.com discusses the music he uses as inspiration to write to. In the article, he links to another post on the Public Library of Science website where several other prominent authors list their own musical muses. Both are fascinating articles that list a lot of classical pieces, such as Bach. While most writers choose the instrumental route (Miles Davis was a common pick), very few seemed to go towards the modern rock or indie route. And there was no heavy metal or dissonant music at all.

Perhaps that says something about what type of music best fits and is able to stimulate the writing part of the brain.

Personally, it depends. If I am writing in the middle of the day, I might try something faster to get a rhythm going - to include death metal, preferably something with unintelligible lyrics. But if I am writing at night and I want the brain to calm down and get into a deep analytical thought process, I will lean towards the aforementioned Miles Davis or perhaps Buckethead's Colma, Electric Tears, or Electric Sea albums.

False Facts of a Monkey Movie

Nearly every high school and college teacher tells their students not to rely on Wikipedia.

"Use it as a guide, not as a final source", they say.

"Anyone can update it," they preach.

"It might not be right," they warn.

Most never see an erroneous Wiki entry as even the slightest error is usually quickly corrected by magical wiki elves that live in Maine and spend all their time monitoring the vast expanse of the Wiki Kingdom. They are a diligent group who hardly ever let anything slip past, lest they be beaten by their Illuminati overlords.

Back in December 2012, however, I found the above pic.

Days later, it was deleted.

This couldn't be true, could it? One of the most highly acclaimed sports heroes of the 2000s wasn't actually on steroids, was he?

Another interview Brian Spaeth: Author and Filmmaker

Many moons ago, I would interview people I thought were interesting or who I took some creative influence from. I haven't really done much of that lately, but after reading writer/filmmaker Brian Spaeth's latest book "Flight of a Super Airplane", I figured I would drop him a line and ask him a few questions on writing, filmmaking, and his thoughts on the creative process.

Me: So what’s new? What are you working on these days?

Brian: Currently am in post-production (mostly editing at this point) on A Cleveland in the Rye, a full-length feature we shot mostly in December. There was a pick-up day just last week, and one more day to shoot in June, most likely.

It’s about an inept documentary filmmaker who’s following self-dubbed action lawyer James Cleveland as he tries to find the 7 kidnapped daughters of a prominent Senator inside an abandoned bank.

I also have a (LeBron-centric) book about sports apathy that could possibly come out this summer, and another that uses my Twitter archive to tell the story of a struggling college drop-out trying to make a splash in the tech startup world.

Me: I recently finished your second book in the Super Airplane saga. How would you say it differs from the first?

Brian: I’d say it largely knew what it wanted to be - at least in terms of plot - right from the start, whereas the first didn’t really have a plot until about halfway through, when I realized there was a plot I could attached to the randomness.

That’s the biggest thing - other than that, there are some nixed characters and other details. Flight spends quite a bit of time in the text wondering whether it’s serving as a proper sequel to Prelude or not, so I’d rather not say more than that, since this wise question of yours is indeed answered inside the book.

It’s also twice as long.

Me: The second book ends on a cliffhanger. Will there definitely be a third book? If so, when might readers expect it?

Brian: Yes, definitely will be a third. The story and character arcs are all laid out in my head, and I’ve put some segments down on virtual paper, but I don’t see actually being able to sit down and write this until later this year or early next. The soonest anyone will see Dawn of a Super Airplane is sometime in 2014, unfortunately. I’m actually a huge fan of this series, and really want to read the next one.

Me: Will the third book be the last in the Super Airplane Saga? Or will it continue?

Brian: Will absolutely continue until the story is finished. Flight said it would be six books long, although Prelude claimed five. We’ll see.

Me: You have also put out a movie and have worked on other film projects. Why write books? Which do you find more rewarding: the filmmaking or the writing?

Brian: I go back and forth, but since the rise of the ebook and self-pubbing becoming legit, I am really leaning toward books. There’s more control, you can get more product out in a shorter time, and there no need for gut-wrenching stuff like fund-raising, etc.

I think my filmmaking itches - which are definitely there - will be scratched on YouTube via shorts and such after Rye. My true loves are ideas, and the creative process, and storytelling, and I can do that more often writing books. I’m also fascinated with the economics of indie publishing, and I’d like to be able to devote more time and thought and experimentation to it.

There’s a lot of technical aspects to filmmaking that I just don’t have that love for. I like it, but I’m not one of those people who could be shooting all the time. It becomes tedious for me. (I love it in spurts, but it becomes tedious. And it takes forever.)

Me: What is your writing process, especially with the Super Airplane books? With the abundance of characters and interweaving storylines, how do you keep the story straight when writing?

Brian: It’s kind of different every time. I generally have an idea where I’m going with something, but what usually happens is I’ll just kind of garbage something out until a certain something “clicks”. Sometimes it’s a scene or a line of dialog or who-knows-what, but when it happens, suddenly the picture for the rest of the piece is there in my head.

I see now that I didn’t answer your question, but I guess I’m saying I don’t overthink it - it just kind of creates itself. I of course have checkpoints and things I know need to happen, but I try to make it as organic as possible.

For example, when I killed off Mujukee’s wife in Prelude, it literally wasn’t conceived until it came through the keyboard from my finger. I was like, “Whoa whoa whoa, what just happened?”

Me: I am writing my own book, and have finished the rough draft. So asking this as personal advice as well, what is your editing process? Do you have people read the rough drafts? When are you sure it is ready for print?

Brian: I have two people I go to for editing help now. One I’ve used for a long time, the other is more recent, and now considered invaluable. I listen to everything, but I know when it’s ready. I’ve always been capable of being objective about my own stuff. The number of abandoned projects is proof of it.

Me: True or false: Merri Sherman is not real, Brian Spaeth is real, Brian Spathe is not real, and Calvin Stadiums is real.

Brian: All are true, except Brian Spaeth and Brian Spathe are probably closer to the same person than I’d care to admit.

Me: What about Bruce Willis?

Brian: Bruce has big changes happening in his life in the next book that will bring this into question.

Me: Are there any more Brad Radby movies yet to be discovered?

Brian: Maybe.

Me: What are you reading/watching these days?

Brian: Hmm...I keep trying to catch up on Justified on Amazon Primal, but don’t seem to find the time. Mad Men, but I don’t really like it. Waiting for Breaking Bad, mostly. I’m watching a lot of documentaries on Netflix to get a feel for different editing styles of them.

Me: Looking back now a few years later, thoughts on the YaySports! blog? Was it an effective medium for gaining a fanbase?

Brian: It definitely was - I still have people ask me to bring it back quite often. I sometimes wonder what would’ve happened if I hadn’t turned into a sports apathist. My blahness about the NBA and sports led to mishandling and sacrificing a lot of the attention, audience, and opportunities that I had back then.

Lots was learned, though, and there’s truly never been a better time to be pursuing creative endeavors.

You can find Brian's website here.

100 percent done with the Afghanistan adventure - On to the next chapter

Greetings All,

Well, the adventure is over. I safely returned from Afghanistan on May 2^nd, 2013, 413 days after I departed on my great journey. I am glad to say the Afghanistan chapter of my life is closed, as far as I can tell, and I am beginning another new and exciting chapter.

413 days is a long time. There were of course good days and bad days, and some better than others. But most days were just work days, plugging along in a mission I hope improved a nation that ranked at the bottom of every feasible list of attributes in 2000. In 12 years, the world has done a lot of work to fix Afghanistan, and I am glad I played a role. As a co-worker once said, “The days go by slow, but the months pile up quickly.”

That they did.

On a personal level, I am glad to be home. It was an arduous trip, as most journeys across the world are. 18 hours in an airplane is never easy, especially when you are on a one-way trip from a nation known for terrorism to the United States sporting a beard that is almost a foot long. And yes, I was stopped by the powers that be. I was searched by security in London during a layover and then hassled by a customs agent in Miami. It was an interesting exchange that went something like this:

Customs Agent: So where are you coming from?

Me: Afghanistan

Customs Agent: What were you doing over there?

Me: I can’t tell you that.

Customs Agent: Was it secret work?

Me: You could say that.

Customs Agent: What agency did you work for?

Me: I can tell you my company, but that’s it.

Customs Agent: How long were you there?

Me: 14 months.

Customs Agent: That’s longer than a year.

Me: Yes, it is.

Customs Agent: You can go.

Me: Thank you.

Sure, I could have told him more, but after being awake through two nine-hour flights and an eight-hour layover in Dubai, I didn’t want to be bothered by some second-rate security guard in my home state.

Anyway, after I made it through the loving embrace of security and landed in Orlando, I was welcomed by my parents and little nephew. It was so good to see them. They had a balloon for me and everything. Although it wasn’t as emotional as surprising them in Washington DC in October, just seeing them again was so cool.

I spent my first week home in the Sea View Motel, a small, privately-owned, beautiful, quiet beach motel in Melbourne Beach, Florida, about 30 minutes from my parents and as far away from the world as I could be. Every night after dinner with my folks, I went back to the hotel, drank a beer or two, and relaxed to the sound to the waves. And I slept. A lot. I slept for over 10 hours twice and over 8 hours every day I was at the Sea View. It was the perfect place to relax, walk along the water, and forget Afghanistan. Highly recommended, and not just if you are returning from a warzone.

After checking out of the Sea View Motel, I returned to Tampa to complete some company paperwork and say hello to friends. Although I stopped by my workplace, I was definitely still in vacation mode. I met friends at a Tampa Bay Rays game, hung out in Tampa’s Ybor City, went to a rock concert, went to a comedy show at the Tampa Improv, and closed the week by seeing my brother do his pro wrestling thing. It was great going out and being social again, and so glad I could plan it all in the same week. It worked out perfect.

(Side note 1: I did a write up for the concert I went to for the Tampa Bay Times. It was published here:

Review: Clutch unite metal fans old and new at the State Theatre in St. Petersburg)

(Side note 2: Before I left, I would see my brother do his pro wrestling thing every month. When I returned to boo him, so many people who work for the promotion and other wrestling fans welcomed me back. They asked me how I was and how my adventure was and they said it was great to have me back. That was heartwarming. So a big thanks to wXw Wrestling and the fine folks there.)

Following the second week of my “vacation”, I realized it was time to get back into the swing of things. Although I wasn’t back to top speed in regards to dealing with the fast paced American society, I was still eager to move on. Following a brief trip to New York this past weekend for a memorial service, that leads me to where I am now.

I am still looking for a place to live. I am still looking for a job. I am still hoping to get accepted into the University of South Florida Masters of Business program and start classes in the fall. I know all of these things will come in time. They are all part of the next chapter.

And now, as I close the book on the Afghanistan chapter and return to the American way of life, I am definitely excited to be back and to see what this new chapter has to offer.

Communicating from Afghanistan

A few months ago, a friend asked me several questions about staying in touch while in Afghanistan. Since I am or was sort of a subject matter expert in that, I provided my thoughts and answers.

What are some of your biggest challenges with communicating back home?

Do you find yourself telling the same stories and updates to everyone and it drives you nuts telling it over and over?

What do guys who are deployed usually need from their family?

Items, encouragement, money, all of the above?

What is the biggest pain there when it comes to staying in touch back here?

Wow. Those are great questions. First, it depends on the base. Some headquarters bases are more linked up than others. I was in one near the city of Kabul that the web was pretty good. My current base is slower, much slower. Trying to download anything, for example, times out.

So that is a challenge. And I would assume more so in the more rural smaller bases. Otherwise, FB, gchat, and skype are usually the prime communication tools. Some people even have wifi on their iphones. It is amazing seeing people stay in touch. I hope that answers question 1.

In regards to question 2, I usually talk to so few people online via skype that I usually don't have to tell the same stories. The blog helps too. But sometimes it's ok telling the same thing over again. It means they are asking, which is better than them not, I guess. Some people have no clue what to ask people out here and that's usually more of a challenge.

Things most people get excited about is food, pictures, just things that remind them of home. Not sure how much is needed, outside of the emotional. This is the toughest mental thing I have ever done, personally. Not sure about the typical military folks, though.

Not much is a big pain when it comes to staying in touch, personally, outside of just being outside the rhythm of the people you care about. A year is tough as people go different ways. But other than that. Probably the connection itself.