Monday, December 28, 2009

Kitchen Revolution



Here is a little poem I've been noodling with over the last week. Something random.

Kitchen Revolution

Kitchen spatulas
Attack like tarantulas
Spare only neighborhood treasurers
Their spouses locked in slaughterhouses

Banging for help in the code of Morses
General spoons riding in on horses
Phlebotomists tangle with solutions
Nooses tied around the handles of knives who doth protested

The damnation of dalmatians
While those bitten by Siamese kittens
Could only count the scars.

Pots and pans lay the groundwork
Microwaves keep the frequency
Communications flow easily

Through comparable components used to cooperation
Can openers slice their way past defenses
Soulless toasters dance to the rhythm in sequences

Victory employed coroners
The result of woks whacking their owners

Business was good the day
Mixers, whiskers, and egg beaters turned the tables
And revolted against the eaters.


Note: after finishing this poem, I googled "spatulas". Apparently the Internet is a strange place and I am not the only one inspired by the idea of violent kitchenware. Check out the movie Spatula Madness. It is about a group of spatulas who fight giant wooden spoons. Although not quite the animated version of my poem, it is close enough for me to know "Kitchen Revolution" will never be turned into the next Avatar.

Oh well.

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